Thursday, October 13, 2011

Thrilling Thursday's Halloween News of the Weird!!!!

   As I was having my second pumpkin cappuccino and catching up on my reading, I overheard a very strange news story on one of the local news channels. There is weird news year round, but it seems to increase around Halloween time. I decided to look around and see what else was going on out there. Below, you will find a collection of real news of the real weird!

From the Zombie files.....Scientist unearth ancient bodies and are able to completely map the genome of the black plague.

Full story 

   Seems that some scientist in England have been unearthing mass graves containing victims of the black plague. As luck would have it, they were able to extract intact strains of the the plague from the teeth of the dead. Now that they have it, they are experimenting on it.
   That is right folks, they are fooling around with the source of the biggest human disaster in history. The black death that claimed over half of population of Europe in under 5 years. 

   What could go wrong? What possible harm could come of messing with it? 

Zombie Apocalypse!

Nebraska Ace Hardware store offers "Zombie Preparedness Center " online and a new Zombie Defense isle.

Actual website here

   What I wouldn't give to manage this store.... or at least shop in it! This is the real deal. About a week ago, the Lincoln Nebraska Ace Hardware store started a zombie campaign. 

Full Story Here
   The campaign is taking off well a virus! Other Ace stores are "dying" to set up their own displays. Hopefully, this will spread and soon you and I can shop for our own personal Zombie Defense.

   The public loves it, the company is crazy about it. The only group that is upset... you guessed it... the zombies!

Just in time for the scientist fooling around with the Black Plague!

Connecticut man attempts suicide with chainsaw!

News Story Here

   Notice I said "attempts". He tried to saw his head off,  but was unsuccessful. How one could be unsuccessful sawing a head off with a chainsaw is not clear to me, but he survived. 
   I Googled this and apparently, this is a pretty common suicide method and most are successful.
   I wonder what possessed the guy to try to saw his own head off with a chainsaw? 

Maybe he was succumbing to the newly created black plague zombie virus and just happened to be near an Ace Hardware store....

While we are on the subject of zombies, did you know that the CDC (Center for Disease Control) had a page on their goverment web site dedicated to dealing with a zombie appocolypse?
Actual website here

It's the real deal. Above, is the banner I display on my blog's home page. They have others banners and buttons so you too can show you proudly back the CDC's advances in preparedness for imminent zombie attack. 

In Costume Criminal news..."Moss Man" fails to show up to court for trial.

Full story here
   Apparently this guy, Gregory Liascos,  was trying to break into a museum last October (how fitting). Police arrived at the Rice Northwest Museum of Rocks and Minerals to find a hole cut in the wall of the museum, a backpack, and a bike (the preferred getaway vehicle of the damned). Gregory was hiding a few feet away in a full ghillie suit (head to toe military camouflage outfit). His outfit was working till they brought in a dog. Police were surprised when the dog bit down on the "ground" and the "ground" cried out in pain. 

   Greg failed to show up for his trial a year later and authorities are looking for him. All I can say is.. good luck on finding him! Maybe he will start a cult following... THE LEGEND OF THE MOSS MAN! 

 Maybe he showed up, but they just could not see him because he was so well camouflaged? 

In Creepy Creature News.....Black Widow Spider bites have DOUBLED over the last month in Oklahoma!

Full Story Here

   According to the Oklahoma Poison Control Center, Black Widow bites are over double what they were last year. They suspect that many more have gone unreported. 

   Experts think the biting bonanza is due to the drought and the heat, which the spiders love.

 I think they are just gearing up for Halloween!

Scientist 95% sure they have found the Siberian Yeti.

Full Story Here
   Russian Scientist called for a news conference where they released that they had found footprints, den, urine markers and "irrefutable scientific proof of the Yeti's existence".  They have also brought forth hair samples of the alleged beast. 
   Experts fear that it could just be a ruse to promote tourism but many in the Bigfoot Community are hopeful they DNA results will bring the proof they have been looking for. 

I think there is no Yeti.... just the Florida Skunk Ape on Vacation.

And finally, from the "Dial 911 if you're stupid" file we have ....Halloween Display prompts 911 call. Halloween prop builders all over the world rejoice!

Full Story Here
   A Halloween display prompts a passing driver to dial 911 in North Carolina. Luckily, somebody with common sense called in right after to tell authorities that it was just a really good Halloween decoration.
   To think, I worry about my neighbors watching me build coffins and roll up red paint spattered shower curtains and rugs. A 911 call is like an academy award for home haunters! Hat's off to this creative Halloween fan.

But wait, there's more!

   Another home haunter's creative display gets similar accolades and a 911 call!

Full Story Here
  Yet another home haunter in North Carolina has tricked another clueless person into calling 911. His display shows a man hanging from the gutter of his house. While this is not particularly scary, it still symbolizes what we all hope our displays do for the general public... striking fear into their hearts.

 Apparently,  North Carolina is full of Halloween fans! Who knew?

All I can say to these two prop makers is.... 


Family calls 911 for help when they get lost in a corn maze...during the day!

Full Story Here
   A grown woman... her adult husband... and their 3 week old baby got lost in a corn maze in Massachusetts.  This prompted the woman to call 911 for help. She was quoted as saying " I thought this would be fun but it turned out to be a nightmare. Never again!"
   Police were dispatched with K9 units and were able to locate the family in under 10 minutes. Here is an aerial photo of the smallish maze they got lost in :

 I have a few problems with this.
  1. It's just a corn maze!
  2. Why did the husband not do something. The wife had to call 911 and take charge of the situation! Jeez man! Grow a pair of pumpkins!
  3. It's just a corn maze!!
  4. You are basically stuck in a field of corn. Not razor wire or cinder blocks. Just push through the stalks and walk STRAIGHT out of the corn!
  5. It's just a corn maze!!!
  6. It wasn't even haunted and it was daylight!
  7. It's just a corn maze!!!!
  8. Who takes a 3 week old child to a corn maze?
  9. Did I mention it was just a simple freaking corn maze?!?!?!?!
   All I have to say to this family is.... You are not welcome in my Favorite holiday.

Perhaps they should try a corn maze that is more their speed.

Texas man bites woman who dials 911. Man confesses to police he is actually a 500 year old vampire!

Full Story Here

   The 500 year old vampire, who was carrying ID that identified him as 19 year old Lyle Monroe Bensley, broke into the apartment of a woman he did not know and forced his way into her bedroom.  He attempted to drag the woman out of the apartment but she fought her way lose and called 911. She reported he was growling and and hissing at her while he attacked her. He was also just wearing boxer shorts (everybody knows that ancient vampires attack in their undies).
   When police arrived, Lyle was shrieking and growling as he begged the police to restrain him before he could kill them as he needed to feed. 
   Lyle is currently in jail waiting for a psychiatric evaluation to see if he suffers from any mental dysfunctions (You think?). 

I wonder if he has a sister in Florida?
I had a previous post about this "vampire" eating a n elderly mans face at a vacant hooters Click for the story!

They could both learn a thing or two about discretion from fellow Vampire Nicolas Cage:

Click here for past wicKED news article on this famous Vamp
The Count hangs his head in shame at these two pathetic would be vamps:
Click here for previous wicKED post about the REAL COUNT!

   Last, but not least, we have some wicKED news. I just hit a small milestone of 50 followers through Google Friend Connect. The lucky number 50 was Ray Lukard  who is the author of The Haunted Library  and  Fenwright Manor blog. Thank you Ray for your support and thanks to all my other followers. I am glad out of the 1000 hits I get a day, 50 of you had the B.A.L.Z. to follow me! 
   It's almost the weeKEnD... It's going to be extra busy for me but it promises to be wicKED! Happy Haunting all! 


  1. Thanks for all the news links. Some gave me a laugh while others have me shake my head in wonder. I'm sure we'll here about an outbreak of the Black Plague in the near future. I hope i'm wrong about that.

    I really hope my hometown Ace Hardware gets the zombie stuff. That would be pretty awesome.

    We're going to a corn maxe this weekend, I'll let you know if I have to call 911.

  2. Vivienne - Good luck in the maze! Maybe you should go by Ace and get a chainsaw for the maze.

  3. I just might do that. Though I could just look up at the sun to know which direction to go in. I've had to do that before when I got turned around in the woods.

  4. I love weird news stories! Although, I'm always a little troubled to learn about all the crazy people out there... That skiing Yeti picture is great! I think my favorite story was the one about the guy dressed in camouflage. "Police were surprised when the dog bit down on the "ground" and the "ground" cried out in pain." Ha!

    If you look on the left column of my blog, you'll see a little badge I made that links to more weird news stories. It says "weird news: updated weekly" These stories are published in one of our local papers. I'm sure you'll enjoy reading through those because they're bizarre!

  5. Thanks WicKED I really needed a good chuckle after a day of bending Halloween props to my will. I actually caught the news coverage of the "guy" who was run over by the lawn tractor. Great prop! Speaking of Nick Cage have you seen these other amazing images:

  6. Thanks art bliss... I had not seen them, but that explains a lot. Hollywood is full of Vampires!

  7. I got "lost" for an hour and a half the other day in a frickin corn maze. How did I get out? You guessed it, I went THROUGH the corn. In other words, I cheated. But at least I lived to admit it.
    You should check out the story in Denver about a couple of guys who didn't realize their buddy had died in the back seat of their car while they were all bar hopping on a Saturday night. They just kept hitting the bars and using his credit card. When they sobered up they discovered the dude had been dead the whole time. They are being charged with "abusing a corpse." People are strange!

  8. Gosh, they all need a corn maze like the one we went thru this year...besides the corn only being knee high in places - the workers point out the high tension power lines that you can see from everywhere - and that is the direction to the exit!

    Some of those articles really make me fear for the human race!

  9. Congrats on the followers! You have a cult now!

    And can I just shout for a moment that I LOVE STORIES ABOUT THE PLAGUE!!! I know, this makes me someone who should not be invited to parties. I watched that Sean Bean atrocity Black Death just because it involved plague. To the bitter freaking end, I watched it. And never did he look befuddled enough to justify it.

    I digress. The plague fascinates me. Did you know that some of the diseases that kill us in middle age and beyond are around simply because the same traits that cause them led our ancestors to have better immune response to the plague? Yeah. At least that is a theory. Such a cool field to study. I am insanely jealous of those scientists. Some ghouls have all the luck.


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